She'll be right

"She'll be right": a phrase that basically means "it'll be okay," or "don't worry, it'll work itself out." It's tied to the general laid-back attitude of Australian mentality. The gender word "she" doesn't really mean anything. I guess it's along the same line as referring to a boat as "she."

Me: "So I'm basically screwed for nursing, because I suck at chemistry, there's a super long list of prereqs and the ones I did fulfill I did extremely poorly in."
Australian friend: "Aw, she'll be right, Camille."
Me: "Who will be right?"

This past weekend was wonderful! I had my two day field excursion for my philosophy class, Education in Natural Landscapes. We visited two sheep farms, a winery, a piggery, an ostrich farm and stayed in an old-fashioned shearer's lodge. I also helped herd sheep and cuddled a piglet, which was definitely fun. Piglets are sooo cute! They're very shy at first, but after they have time to get used to you, they grunt for you to pet them. However, I definitely think that the best part was bonding with my classmates. Has anyone played a card game called Bortak (sp?) before? This Norwegian guy introduced the game to us, and it's really fun. I'll teach it to you guys sometime.

I also got to really know my philosophy professor. Teachers at Australia are so informal that it's a little disconcerting. He insisted that we call him John, and during dinner, he plunked down right next to me.
"So Camille," he said. "I noticed that you jumped right in there when the farmer asked for volunteers to help herd the sheep."
I was a little taken aback by his sudden appearance, so I stammered a bit. "Uh-um yeah, I really like animals."
"I also noticed that you were talking to the farmer a lot about shearing."
"Yeah, I had a few questions about their tools."
"Do you know that shearers use special adhesive gloves to hold onto the sheep?"
"Yes."
"Do you know the running joke about those gloves?"
I started to sense something was up, but answered anyway. "No...?"
"Well," said my professor, "the joke was that shearers liked to wear those gloves because when they grab sheep..." he trailed off and instead held out his hands like he was holding a very large ball. Before I could nervously ask what he was doing, he then suddenly launched into a series of pelvic thrusts.

I stared at him in astonishment, at a loss of words. I was unused to bestiality jokes coming from quiet, balding, philosophy professors, especially professors who are very soft-spoken and have two young children. Luckily, I managed to collect my wits in time, laughed gaily and then quickly dug into my salad. Nonetheless, I think he has just become one of my favorite professors.

So I just had my third day of work at my new job. I'm getting a little better at it, even though I did have a huge mess-up yesterday. Last night was the AFL game between the Melbourne Blues and Collingwood. Everyone hates Collingwood and especially their fans, who are "gap-toothed, drunken wife-beaters," according to my Australian classmate. Luckily, the Blues won, so the restaurant was filled with footy fans. That, plus the fact that it was Sunday night (always a busy night) meant the place was filled to bursting. The kitchen was backed up and there was literally a hour long wait for the customers to get their food. Camille was not a happy camper. I ended up taking orders for a table of ten for the very first time. First off, they spewed orders at me from all directions. I couldn't tell who ordered what. Secondly, I was still very unfamiliar with the menu (my fault) so I didn't know half the stuff I was taking down. Thirdly, almost everyone wanted adjustments to their orders.
"Can I have the pineapple pizza, except instead of pineapple, can I have garlic?"
"My husband will have the fish of the day, except I want it well done with extra potatoes. Can you ask the chef if he'll give me extra potatoes?"
"Wait, cross out that order for pineapple pizza, I want the one with goat cheese instead. And garlic. I still want garlic too."
SCREAM. Of course, I discovered much later that I missed taking down two orders. It was a wonder that I didn't mess up on anything else. Unfortunately, the family put up a racket about how I missed "half" their order (2/10 is not half, you idiots) and the boss had to go and apologize. Jerks. The only highlight of the day (besides the free pizza dinner) was that I was introduced to a very gorgeous coworker. When I say gorgeous, I really mean it. This girl looks just like Scarlett Johannsen - blonde hair, wide blue eyes and that signature pouty mouth. The only difference is that she has a very slender frame. Even though this girl's only in year 11, which means she's 16/17 years old, she looks like a freshman in Uni.

Luckily, tonight went well. Monday nights are slow, so I ended up working only 2 hours. This meant I got off early enough to eat some really good pasta. Usually the kitchen is closed by the time I get off of work, so I have to eat pizza (not that I'm complaining). I also discovered that I have my very own tip jar, which already had some money inside. Thus, the night ended for me with a bellyful of Gnocchi Romana and a handful of change.